January 3, 2008 Screencaps

The following scenes include brief portions of Nikolas but have nothing to do with his storyline. They pertain to Luke reliving portions of his life through others.

Tracy: Luke?

Alarm.

Tracy: Luke? Luke? Oh, my God. I need a doctor. You didn't -- you didn't! I need help in here! What's taking so long?

Leyla: We have a code blue in room 527!

Tracy: Luke Spencer, you are going to have to cheat death just one more time.

Luke: What fresh hell is this?

Judge: This court is now in session, the Most Honorable Judge Lucas Lorenzo Spencer presiding.

Luke: Huh. Well, I do have a sense of humor.

Judge: Quiet. Put on your listening ears.

Luke: Your Honor, may I ask -- where -- where is this court?

Judge: It is far deep within the purgatorial provinces of your warped and distorted psyche.

Luke: Well, what's the deal?

Judge: Mr. Spencer, your soul -- for the lack of a better, more precise word -- is on trial. And frankly, Sir, so far, you're an idiot!

Leo: Give me another push of epi.

Alarm.

Leyla: He's still in v-fib.

Leo: All right, charge the paddles to 200. That better have been one hell of a cigar.

Paddles charge.

Leyla: Charged.

Leo: All right. Clear. Hmm! Come on.

Luke: Wow. That judge is one handsome dude. He likes me, too -- I can tell. This is going to be a cakewalk. Or not.

Second Luke: The judge said something about "purgatorial province." I don't know what the hell that means, but it takes a long time to get the hang of this jurisprudence lingo.

First Luke: Well, I'm not going to be here that long.

Second Luke: Be careful what you ask for.

Prosecutor: Your Honor, the prosecution is prepared to proceed.

Luke: Oh, I like that suit. Now, see, you should've dressed like that.

Judge: You may call your first witness.

Prosecutor: I call Alexis Davis.

Luke: Well, this should be okay. Natasha and I go back a long way.

Prosecutor: Ms. Davis, did the defendant approach you with a plan to kill Helena Cassadine?

Alexis: Yes.

Luke: Well, she slit her mother's throat and kidnapped and brainwashed my son.

Alexis: He thought that we should saw the parapet railing in Helena’s home so that she might "have an accident."

Prosecutor: And did an innocent woman, one Katherine Bell, fall instead and become critically injured?

Alexis: Yes.

Luke: Well, that was her own damn fault.

Prosecutor: Did the defendant step forward and admit what he had done?

Alexis: No. He thought we should cover it up.

Prosecutor: Did he at any time show any remorse?

Alexis: No.

Luke: Aren't you going to object?

Lawyer: Object to what?

Prosecutor: I call Caroline Corinthos Jacks to the stand. You were given up for adoption when you were a child, were you not, Ms. Corinthos Jacks?

Carly: Yes, my mother was young, in difficult circumstances. My father wasn't present and she wanted me to have the life that she could never give me.

Prosecutor: And your mother is?

Carly: Bobbie Spencer.

Prosecutor: The defendant's sister.

Carly: Yes.

Prosecutor: And when Luke Spencer found out that you were his niece -- the long-lost daughter that his sister was forced to give up when she was little more than a child, the same daughter at she had been worried about and yearning for all those years -- what did he do?

Carly: He blackmailed me to keep my mouth shut so I wouldn't tell my mother the truth.

Prosecutor: He used threats and intimidation to keep you away from your own mother!

Carly: Yes, he did.

Luke: Well, when you put it like that, it sounds bad. Come on, I'm dying here.

Lawyer: That would be my assessment.

Luke: When I said "I'm dying here," I was referring to this lousy representation. Why aren't you cross-examining?

Lawyer: Because I'm trying to get the witnesses off the stand as quickly as possible.

Luke: What kind of defense strategy is that?

Lawyer: The faster they're out of here, the sooner they quit saying damning things about you.

Prosecutor: I call Edward Quartermaine to the stand.

Edward: Luke Spencer is a liar and a thief, and he duped my daughter into getting drunk in order to trick her into marrying him.

Luke: Nobody even asked him a question. The old blowhard just spouted off -- object already. Oh, give me some of that.

Luke: Nuts.

Edward: He's been sponging off of Tracy and the rest of us ever since. I say the hell with him, literally.

Luke: He wants to be the executioner.

Edward: Spectator. I want to watch you fry.

Lawyer: I object.

Luke: Finally.

Lawyer: I object to this antiquated, out-of-date definition of "hell." We all know that there are far worse things awaiting the defendant than the old-fashioned fire and brimstone.

Judge: The comment will be stricken.

Lawyer: Thank you.

Prosecutor: I call police commissioner Mac Scorpio. You are married, Mr. Scorpio?

Mac: Not that it made any difference to Luke.

Luke: Felicia was a P.I. I hired her to help me find my son.

Mac: He slept with my wife.

Prosecutor: With wanton disregard for your marriage.

Mac: When he seduced Felicia, he was married to Laura, the supposed love of his life.

Prosecutor: I call Skye Chandler Quartermaine.

Luke: Oh, at last -- someone in my corner.

Prosecutor: Did you have sexual relations with the defendant while he was married to Tracy Quartermaine?

Skye: Yes.

Luke: Blaze, give me a break here.

Judge pounds gavel.

Judge: Shh! I'm losing my patience here, Mr. Spencer. I have other things to do today.

Luke: But, Your Honor, you're not getting the full picture.

Judge: Mr. Spencer, do you see my mouth moving? I'm speaking. Put on your listening ears. Your attorney will have plenty of opportunity to speak.

Luke: My attorney doesn't exactly inspire confidence.

Prosecutor: I call Tracy Quartermaine.

Luke: I object. A wife cannot be forced to testify against her husband.

Tracy: I volunteered.

Prosecutor: You and the defendant went to Las Vegas for your wedding.

Tracy: No. Luke told me that my son had eloped, so he promised to help me bring him back home. It was a big, fat lie.

Prosecutor: Tell the court about your wedding ceremony.

Tracy: I was dead drunk, in a blackout. It was the only way Luke knew I would marry him.

Luke: Ask her why I did it.

Tracy: He did it so that he could force me into returning some disputed funds. Actually, when he got what he wanted, he refused to divorce me.

Prosecutor: Mrs. Spencer, how would you characterize your husband?

Tracy: Well, let's see -- he is chronically unfaithful, a thief and a liar. He deserts me at the drop of a hat -- oh, and he put poison in my martini once. He said it was a joke, but I didn't find it funny and I knew he was trying to kill me.

Luke: Wife!

Prosecutor: Attempted murder?

Tracy: And that's not the worst of it.

Luke: What can you call me that's worse?

Tracy: You're a coward.

Bailiff: Go.

Tracy: Luke Spencer was too much of a coward to deal with real life, so he took the coward's way out. He lit up a Cuban cigar right after quadruple bypass surgery. You're an idiot!

Prosecutor: I call Nikolas Cassadine. You are the defendant's stepson.

Nikolas: Well, Luke preferred to call me "the spawn," and that's exactly how he treated me -- as if I were the son of the devil.

Luke: Oh, come on, Nik -- not for a long time now.

Nikolas: See, Luke hated that Laura had a son with another man. He wanted me dead.

Prosecutor: I call Lesley Webber to the stand. Your daughter, Laura, was married to the defendant.

Lesley: Yes.

Luke: Lesley's always liked me.

Lesley: Luke would say that Laura was the love of his life. What he'd fail to mention is that he got her into constant danger, he took her "on the run" for years, and when he first met her, she was married to another man and he destroyed her marriage.

Scott: I reached out to Luke, I befriended him. And how did he pay me back? By hitting on my wife, and when she resisted, he raped her.

Luke: Why aren't you objecting or cross-examining?

Lawyer: Because everything that's being said is true.

Judge: The defense may now present its case.

Luke: Finally.

Lawyer: I call Barbara Jean Spencer to the stand. Ms. Spencer, what is your relationship with the defendant?

Bobbie: Well, he's my big brother, but he was a lot more to me when we were growing up. I mean, he was the closest thing I ever had to a parent. He was my best friend. Luke was the person that I looked to for guidance.

Lawyer: For example?

Bobbie: He encouraged me to become a prostitute.

Lawyer: Oh.

Bobbie: No, there's more. When Luke discovered that my daughter was alive and living in Port Charles going by the name of "Carly," he lied to my face and told me she was dead.

Luke: This is my defense?

Lawyer: I call Lucky Spencer to the stand. Mr. Spencer, please tell the court about your relationship with your father.

Lucky: Imagine a father bigger than life. A father who understood you and guided you and gave you all the tools to get on in the real world. Well, that's not my dad.

Lawyer: He took an unconventional approach?

Lucky: Oh, he hated being a father. Yeah, he'd tell you straight up. He only did it for my mom, and then he'd use any excuse and bail on her to go on some great adventure, which mostly involved a lot of booze and women.

Lawyer: Exaggerated claims, no doubt overheard by the witness from the defendant's detractors.

Lucky: Oh, I was there. He dragged me all around the world when I was a kid, giving me these lessons in life. The things that he drilled into me -- contempt for my brother, contempt for the law.

Lawyer: And through these things, you gained --

Lucky: Yeah, lying, cheating, running a scam.

Lawyer: You gained insight into the real world. He prepared you for the harsh realities.

Lucky: It didn't prepare me for when I found out that he raped my mother.

Lawyer: That'll be all. Thank you. That's it. No more questions. Ooh. Tough witness.

Judge: Do you wish to cross-examine?

Prosecutor: I have only one question for this witness, Your Honor. Do you think Luke Spencer was a good father?

Lucky: I don't think he was any kind of father at all.

Leo: Ahem.

Tracy: Well?

Lucky: How is he?

Leo: We were able to get his heart back in rhythm.

Tracy: Is he going to be all right?

Leo: We're going to have to run tests before we know if he sustained any damage to the valves I just replaced, so -- excuse me.

Lulu: What happened? I thought Dad was doing better.

Tracy: This is what happened. Luke Spencer is what happened. Either he lives his life his way, or not at all.

Lulu: I basically grew up without either of my parents. I got real sick when I was little, and they divorced right after that. My mom had a mental breakdown, and my dad didn't want any part of being a single father.

Lawyer: Well, he did reach out to you, in his own special way.

Luke: Ask her about the ice fishing.

Lulu: He took me three times. I mean, the way he talks about it, you'd think it was this huge bonding experience, but we just sat there with our lines in the water. It was too cold to even talk. I think that's why he took me.

Lawyer: During the encephalitis scare at the hospital, turned out that your father had a natural immunity, and he agreed to let them draw blood to make an antidote, as long as you were given the antidote first.

Luke: She should've been first, but the -- the list got switched.

Lulu: I was glad for that. You were so afraid that I was going to die that you never left my side. You were the father that I always wanted. But he said that he never wanted kids, and he never wanted me. So I knew not to trust it. I knew it wouldn't last.

Judge: Does the defense wish to call any further witnesses?

Lawyer: The defense rests.

Luke: What about closing arguments?

Judge: There will be no closing arguments in my court.

Luke: Oh, give me a break, Your Honor. You know, you seem like a very intelligent, reasonable man. You're handsome. You know, the -- the distinguished robe and the hair and everything. It really works for you.

Judge: Thank you, Mr. Spencer. But your good taste is not in dispute. We'll go straight to the jury.

Luke: What jury?

Judge: How does the jury find?

Scott: Guilty!

Edward: Guilty.

Lesley: Guilty.

Mac: Guilty.

Carly: Guilty.

Nikolas: Guilty.

Skye: Guilty.

Alexis: Guilty.

Bobbie: Guilty.

Lucky: Guilty.

Lulu: Guilty.

Tracy: Not guilty.

Prosecutor: But you testified against him!

Tracy: I know. Now I'm testifying for him. Luke is not a perfect father. God knows he's not a perfect husband. He's a deeply flawed man. But despite all of those flaws, he has been there for each and every one of us. He would not condemn us, and we cannot condemn him. Not guilty.

Lulu sighs.

Lulu: I -- I'm changing my vote. Not guilty.

Lucky: Not guilty.

Bobbie: Not guilty.

Skye: Not guilty. But not innocent by a long shot.

Alexis: Not guilty.

Carly: Not completely guilty.

Nikolas: Not guilty.

Lesley: Not guilty.

Mac: Not guilty.

Edward: Not guilty -- this time.

Scott: All right, all right. Not guilty, only because I want a good rummy around to insult.

Lawyer: Yes!

Judge: By unanimous decision, the defendant, Lucas Lorenzo Spencer, is found not guilty.

Luke: Thanks for the assist, wife.

Tracy: Thank God you're alive. Because now I'm going to kill you, you selfish son of a bitch.