Lucky: It's okay. I'm here and I'm going to take care of you.
Emily: I'm just so tired, Lucky.
Lucky: You know what? It's all right now. You're safe. I'm going to keep you safe just like I've been doing since we were kids.
Emily: I wish we could go back and be kids again. The bad things that have happened would be magically gone. I wouldn't have to feel the way I do.
Lucky: What way?
Emily: I don't know. Like I just can't take it anymore.
Lucky: Can't take what?
Emily: Listen, Lucky. Why even talk about it? There's no going back. The worst is over, right? I just want to move forward, leave the past behind.
Elizabeth: Hey.
Emily: Elizabeth, hi.
Elizabeth: I stopped by to see how Lucky was settling in.
Lucky: I'm good, you know? Housekeeper -- she brought some snacks, got my room all made up. I'm kind of getting real used to all this attention.
Emily: Hey, Elizabeth, since you're here, would you mind staying with Lucky for a little while? I have to go run some errands.
Elizabeth: No. Not a problem.
Emily: Okay. I'll be back as soon as I can. Bye.
Lucky: Bye.
Elizabeth: Do you see what I mean?
Lucky: Emily's getting worse.
Emily: Hi --
Jason: Hey.
Emily: Jase. Hi, Sam.
Sam: Hi, Emily.
Jason: What's going on?
Emily: I came by to see how you were doing.
Jason: Uh -- you know, I'm all right.
Emily: Yeah. I tried to come up with some way to make you feel better. I know it's not realistic -- you loved Michael so much -- but, anyway, I made you some of my famous chocolate chip cookies.
Jason: Thank you. I appreciate it.
Sam: Um -- I actually was just leaving. I have to return this file to Agent Marshall. I will see you guys later.
Emily: Okay.
Sam: It's good to see you.
Emily: Yeah, you, too.
Door closes.
Emily: You know, Sam doesn't have to run out the door every time I come to visit.
Jason: No, no, she could tell I wanted to be alone with you. What happened?
Emily: Nothing. Why do you ask?
Jason: What are you talking -- you're hurting. Something's wrong.
Emily: Yeah. There is.
Jason: Okay, well, just tell me what it is. I can fix it.
Emily: You can't.
Elizabeth: Lucky, you helped me because you loved me and I loved you, and that's what made me start to feel whole again. And you made me feel beautiful and desirable despite the ugly thing that happened to me. I mean, do you -- do you plan on loving Emily like that, I mean, not as a friend but as a woman?
Lucky: You know we're not like that.
Elizabeth: Okay, well, then maybe you're not the one to help her.
Lucky: It should be Nikolas, but he's in prison. He can't give her the support she needs, so I'm just here to fill in.
Elizabeth: I -- i know your intentions are good, but --
Lucky: Look, I know -- you know what? I am not Emily's lover. I'm her oldest friend, and all I can do is do my best and just hope it's enough.
Emily: Jase, you're grieving for Michael. It's not fair of me to come over here and dump all of my --
Jason: You said I can't help. Maybe I can't, but I can listen.
Emily: Listen, I should go. Lucky's staying at Wyndemere --
Jason: No, no, no, no. Emily, you want to tell me, or you wouldn't have come over here in the first place.
Emily: I should've come to you first.
Jason: When?
Emily: Helena's alive. We have to prove it so that we can get Nikolas out of prison. So we -- I asked Connor Bishop to impersonate Nikolas. And the idea was that that would bring Helena out of hiding. But things went wrong and I had to go into hiding myself. I should've called you, Jase, and asked you to help. But the plan was for me to stay in a safe house with Connor, and I thought that that would get Nikolas out of prison faster.
Jason: Okay. So that's what you did.
Emily: I was so focused on the plan that I didn't see what was right in front of me. Connor was crazy, Jase. He thought that I belonged to him, and I didn't understand until it was too late, and then I tried to get away. I fought as hard as I could, but Connor trapped me in the basement. He -- uh -- threw me down, and I kept fighting, but he was stronger than I was. Connor raped me.
Emily: Thanks for not making some standard, trite response like "it's going to be all right," or, you know, "just get counseling, therapy."
Jason: You need to do whatever feels right to you.
Emily: That's what I love about you, Jase. And why I felt so safe telling you.
Jason: All right, I -- I hate to even ask you this, but, you know, have you been tested for diseases?
Emily: Oh, God, no.
Jason: I'm not saying that you have to do it by any means, but you should --
Emily: No, no, no, no.
Jason: Probably just consider it to be safe.
Emily: I can't stand the thought of an exam. I -- I don't want anyone touching me. Maybe a blood test, but nothing else.
Jason: Okay. No, I understand.
Emily: I keep thinking that I'm going to get past it. You know, it's sick, it's wrong, but millions of women have been through it. You know, rape's always existed.
Jason: I know, but you can't, I mean, compare yourself to anyone else and make judgments on how you think you should feel at this time, you know?
Emily: I know, but I've always thought of myself as a strong person. But I feel so -- so weak, so wound up inside. I mean, Connor's dead. He can't hurt me anymore -- that's what I keep telling myself -- but it doesn't help. And I can't tell anyone. When I went to visit Nikolas, he knew something was wrong. I pulled away from him and he was hurt, and Nikolas thinks of me differently now.
Jason: Well, are you sure?
Emily: It's my fault, not his. Hey, Nikolas has been wonderful. He says that he still loves me. But even if he does, he looks like Connor. And every time Nikolas touches me, I see and feel Connor.
Jason: I'd like to give you a hug, but, you know, if you don't want to be touched, I -- I totally understand.
Emily: Yeah, I don't know. Oh, Jase. I've just been so crazy --
Jason: Yeah.
Emily: Lately. I've been flipping out at the littlest things, yelling at people for no reason. Sorry if I do that to you in advance, okay?
Jason: I mean, you can do whatever you want. Just take it easy.
Emily: You know, I'm so tired. I've been so afraid to sleep. I keep having these nightmares of being chased and attacked. I try to fight it but I can't. Oh. I wake up screaming.
Jason: I have an extra room. You can stay here.
Emily: No, no, no, I don't -- I don't want Sam to know. And promise me that you won't tell her, okay? Promise me that you won't tell anyone.
Jason: All right.
Emily: Listen, I have to get back to Wyndemere. Lucky's staying there and I promised that I'd take care of him.
Jason: Well, you -- you need to take care of yourself, too, Emily.
Emily: Oh, I know. It just keeps me distracted so I don't have to think.
Jason: Okay. I'm not -- i'm not going to tell you what to do. But I'm here if you need me.
Emily: I know. You know, telling you what happened and knowing that you're going to keep my secret, it's helped more than anything.
Emily: Lucky?
Lucky: Hey.
Emily: Hey. Has Elizabeth left?
Lucky: Yeah. She had to go to work.
Emily: Sorry. I didn't mean to leave you alone.
Lucky: No, it's okay. Where'd you go anyway?
Emily: Oh, I just had to run a few errands. I picked up some wine and appetizers.
Lucky: Great. You know what? Let's just have a picnic right here.
Emily: Like the one we had last summer when you took me to the park?
Lucky: Yeah, a lot's changed since then.
Emily: You told me you loved me. You have no idea how many times i've thought of that day, wondering what would've happened if I'd chosen you, and how things would be different if I had.